This series was created to highlight sex bloggers (new and old) to my readers. If you’d like your sex blog featured, please read my instructions and get in touch!
Which sex-related blog(s) do you run and how long have you been at it? By what name may we call you?
I started Hedonish.com in July 2015. I go by Rose.
Sum up your blog (such as theme, goal, focus, quirkiness, uniqueness).
An educational sex blog with sex toy reviews and a focus on chronic illness and sexuality.
What is your blog’s “creation story”? Why was it born? Did any already-established bloggers inspire you?
Well, once upon a time… I felt like I was having a quarter-life crisis and wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with my life. I thought that maybe designing sex toys would be the ultimate combination of two things I love: sexuality and design, and thought a blog would be a good foot in the door to figure it out and make new connections.
I’ve also been casually collecting chronic illnesses over the last few years, many of which affect my sex life, so I also wanted to create some kind of a resource for chronic illness and sexuality. After looking for answers to my own questions on a number of occasions I realized that it’s something that not enough people talk about, and I hope I can help change that.
What is your favorite post on your blog to date? Why?
I think my favorite is my post on Dealing with Sexual Side Effects. I love helping people and I’d love to teach other patients how to advocate for themselves and their sex lives. A lot of people don’t realize it’s something they can and should discuss with their doctors if they have concerns.
What does “sex-positive” mean to you?
I see being sex-positive as a way to describe someone who feels that, as long as it is explicitly and enthusiastically consensual, sex is a good thing!
Have you found any friends (or heroes) in the sex blogging community?
YES—but honestly there are too many to count (but I have many of them listed on my blogroll!). There is an incredible sex blogging community, and being a part of it is really wonderful and inspiring to me. Everyone is really kind and supportive, and I feel like I’ve learned so much from talking with other bloggers.
If one of these readers becomes your biggest fan, where can they follow you on social media?
For sex toy users: Imagine your plane is crashing near a deserted, gorgeous island. Before you jump into your lifeboat, you fumble through your bags to find the perfect sex toy to use until you’re rescued (by awfully good-looking sailors, obviously). Which toy did you choose?
Assuming I’ll have power and an outlet on this deserted island, I’d definitely pick my Doxy Die Cast. If this a deserted island sans power, I’d bring my njoy Pure Wand.
Has sex blogging shaped/influenced you in a broader “real-life” sense? (i.e, your worldview, your personality, your confidence?)
It’s changed a lot about how I look at things, and I see more of the everyday injustices that exist. I’m more aware of the language I use and I try to be more inclusive when I speak or write. It’s also a bit sad to admit, but even as someone who’s always gone out of their way to be well-educated about sex, I don’t think I really understood what consent meant until I started blogging.
It’s also given me a sense of community that I didn’t realize I was missing. The sex-positive community is much more accepting of disabilities than people in my “real-life”, and that’s gone a long way in helping me cope with living with my chronic illnesses.
Introvert or extrovert? Cats or dogs?
Extrovert! Out of the bloggers I’ve had the opportunity to meet in person I think I’m one of the few that feels more comfortable talking face-to-face than via the Internet. I can be shy at times, but I love to be social and talk. Also I’m 100% a dog person (I have two Beagles) so expect cute puppy photos if you follow me on social media.
If you could magically and instantaneously change something about this industry (i.e., sex toy industry, erotica, porn, sex education, etc), what would you change?
There’s so many things that can be improved, but we need better sex education in schools, and there needs to be far more of a focus on teaching people what consent means. I think it would also be great if (when it’s age appropriate) there was education about sexual pleasure as well. Too many people grow up thinking they’re somehow broken, because they don’t realize that whatever their body likes or dislikes is normal.
What are the top 1-3 factors that keep you blogging? What’s keeping you here?
There’s been a big learning curve for dealing with all the ways that my health issues have affected my sex life, but I like the idea that I can use what I’ve learned to help other people who are experiencing their own challenges. I also love the sex-positive community and the other sex bloggers—they’re smart, fun, and most of them love talking about sex toys as much as I do. Also, there’s the perk of getting lots of free sex toys… that never gets old!
Lastly, what advice would you give to readers who are considering starting a sex blog of their own?
Make sure it’s something you really want to do because it’s a ton of work, but it can also be extremely rewarding. Don’t be intimidated by the more established bloggers—I was at first, but they’re some of the nicest people I’ve ever met. And try not to compare yourself to other bloggers; what you’re writing is unique and different (even if you haven’t realized it yet) and your voice matters! Feel free to reach out to me if you have questions or want to chat!