This week, we learn about Righteous Femme!
This series was created to highlight sex bloggers (new and old) to my readers. If you’d like your sex blog featured, please read my instructions and get in touch!
Righteous Femme
1. Which sex-related blog(s) do you run and how long have you been at it? By what name may we call you? Pronouns?
I run Righteous Femme. I started on Twitter by doing guest blogs in early 2019, then in December I started my official blog. You can call me Yael, which is my Hebrew name. It means “Strength of G-d.” I am a cis woman and my pronouns are she/her.
2. Where are you from?
Originally from the San Francisco Bay area of California, now living in the Seattle area in Washington State.
3. Where can we find you on social media?
I am on Twitter @righteous_femme and Facebook @righteousfemme.
4. Sum up your blog (such as its theme, focus, quirkiness, uniqueness).
I focus on sex toys for disabled and plus-sized bodies, as well as toys for LGBT folks.
5. What is your blog’s creation story? Why was it born? Did any already-established bloggers inspire you?
I discovered sex blogs by accident when I joined Twitter to promote my sex work (I spent some time doing phone sex and I still sell custom content). A whole new world opened up! I definitely got my inspiration directly from Miss Ruby Reviews, also Hey Epiphora. I did notice, however, that many sex toys didn’t work for my fat body, and I felt that the sex blogosphere could use more queer voices.
6. What do you do full time? Blog? Or do something else?
I am disabled due to mental illness and chronic pain, and the bulk of my income comes from SSI and my partner. My blog is my full-time job. But really I’m just in it because I want to help people find quality toys and for the free sex toys.
7. Do you consider yourself an advocate/supporter of any particular group(s)? And/Or, are you a member of a group whose voice is often suppressed?
Yes! I am a strong advocate for body acceptance/health at every size, disability rights, LGBT rights and anti-racism.
8. What are your short and long-term goals for your blog? Aiming to stay for years, or is this a short-term hobby?
I am in it for the long haul. I have been a regular blogger since 2002 on LiveJournal (yes I’m old). I also spent a decade blogging on FetLife.
9. What is your favourite post on your blog to date? Why?
My favorite is my post on sex toys for fat bodies. I included all the information I wished I’d had when first buying sex toys. It’s been a popular post and it’s the reason I got my second affiliate account.
10. What does “sex-positive” mean to you?
It means sex without shame to me.
11. Have you found any friends (or heroes) in the sex blogging community?
Yes! My main friend is Sugar Cunt, and I really admire Miss Ruby Reviews and Hey Epiphora.
12. Who is the single biggest supporter of your blog? I.e., moral support, tech skills, resources, anything.
My two friends, Jemma and Bianca. They like every post and are always cheering me on. Also shoutout to my partner, Jan, who helps support the blog financially and is my “stunt penis” for testing toys!
13. How important (or unimportant) is anonymity to you?
I am fortunate to not need anonymity. I don’t ever plan to re-enter the vanilla workforce, and I no longer speak to my conservative family. So it doesn’t really matter to me. All my friends already know my profession.
14. Have you ever had anything bizarre or horrible or funny or amazing happen as a result of blogging?
Yes. When I first started a company approached me to review their toy on Amazon. I was really reluctant, but it was a free toy and I wanted to get started so I did it. Well, the toy was terrible. Easily the weakest I’d ever used. I gave it a generous three stars and the company later sent me an angry PM saying my review was considered to be negative. I had to block them. So, that’s how I learned not to review for Amazon sellers.
15. For sex toy users: If you could only have one sex toy for the rest of your life… what is it?
Only one?! Gosh that’s hard. Probably have to go with the O-Wand. It was the only toy I used for months after purchase because it’s just That Good. It’s absolutely my favorite vibrator. Best $200 I ever spent.
16. Has sex blogging shaped/influenced you in a broader “real-life” sense? (i.e., your worldview, your personality, your confidence?)
It’s definitely changed the way I have sex. Now I refuse to do it without toys. I’m on antidepressants and orgasm is hit or miss via manual stimulation. But with toys I can orgasm every single time.
17. Introvert or extrovert? Cats or dogs? Coffee or tea? Which Hogwarts house?
Extrovert. Cats (I have three). I drink coffee more but I also drink a lot of tea. Hufflepuff.
18. If you could magically and instantaneously change something about this community (i.e., sex toy industry, blogger politics, erotica, porn, sex education, etc), what would you change?
I’d eradicate transphobia and toxic toys.
19. What are the top 1-3 reasons that keep you blogging?
My main reason is that I want to help people choose better toys. Especially fat people, who tend to be overlooked. I also think the sex blogging community could use more queer voices.
20. Lastly, what advice would you give to readers considering starting a sex blog of their own
Read sex blogs!!! I spent months just reading blogs, deciding which toys to try. I really feel spending the time checking out a variety of blogs made my own blog better. Also, self-promote (but don’t spam) on social media, especially Twitter.
Thanks Yael! If you’d like your sex blog featured, please read my instructions and get in touch!